TL;DR
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Sixty and Me published a first-person essay urging readers to rethink six habitual expressions: “I’ll try,” “can’t,” “always,” “never,” “if only” and “but.” The author presents the advice as personal reflection, not as a research-backed rule that particular words must never be used.
Sixty and Me has published a personal essay recommending that readers reconsider six common phrases—“I’ll try,” “can’t,” “always,” “never,” “if only” and “but”—because, the author argues, habitual wording can influence self-talk, motivation and relationships. The piece is reflective advice, not a report of new research or a formal finding that these words should never be spoken.
The essay’s author says the point is not simply to avoid profanity. Instead, the focus is on everyday expressions that can become automatic and, in the author’s view, make it harder to take responsibility, recognize choices or communicate supportively. The proposed alternatives are intended to make statements more specific and constructive.
For “I’ll try,” the author suggests choosing clearer language about whether a person intends to do something. The essay illustrates the point with a family account: the author’s son, Joel, lost weight after his household adopted daily walks and made changes to food and drink at home. The author says he later maintained those practices. This is an individual anecdote, not evidence that particular wording causes weight loss or guarantees success.
The essay also argues that “can’t” can sometimes obscure a choice, while “always” and “never” turn individual incidents into sweeping judgments. “If only,” it says, can keep attention on regrets rather than present options. The author calls “but” a “verbal eraser,” arguing that it can undercut a compliment or apology; the suggested adjustment is sometimes to use “and” instead.
How Wording Shapes Daily Conversations
The piece matters as a practical communication prompt, particularly for readers who notice recurring patterns in their inner speech or close relationships. Replacing an absolute accusation such as “you always” with a description of a specific event can make a disagreement less sweeping. Likewise, an apology that acknowledges an explanation without using it to dismiss responsibility may be clearer to the person hearing it.
Those are the author’s interpretations and examples, not measured outcomes reported by the article. The distinction matters because words do not carry identical effects in every setting: “I can’t” may describe a real limitation, and “but” can be useful for expressing a qualification. The essay’s broader suggestion is to notice whether a habitual phrase helps communicate what a speaker actually means.
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The Essay’s Personal Starting Points
The author links the advice to earlier experiences with affirmations and coaching. They describe making regular phone calls with a colleague for seven years, during which each person shared statements intended to challenge limiting beliefs. The author says both saw progress in their personal and professional lives, but the account is not accompanied by independent measurement or outside evidence.
A second story concerns a friend whose fiancé reportedly removed the word “divorce” from his dictionaries as a gesture of reassurance. The couple remained married more than 40 years later, according to the essay. The anecdote introduces the author’s belief in the emotional weight of words; it does not establish that removing a word caused the lasting marriage.
The headline’s “six words” refers to six expressions or wording patterns rather than six single words: “I’ll try,” “can’t,” “always,” “never,” “if only” and “but.” The author also discusses swear words as a separate personal choice, not as one of the six main examples.
Limits of the Essay’s Advice
The supplied article is a first-person essay and does not cite studies testing whether avoiding these expressions improves motivation, health or relationships. Its examples describe the author’s experiences and opinions; they should not be read as proof that changing vocabulary alone produces particular outcomes.
The headline’s absolute wording—“must not say”—is stronger than the nuance of the advice itself. The essay does not set out a universal rule for every conversation, nor does it distinguish systematically between habitual, self-defeating uses and cases where a phrase accurately describes a constraint or qualification. The source material also does not provide a publication date.
Applying the Suggestions Thoughtfully
The essay’s suggested next step is personal observation: notice which phrases recur in conversation or private self-talk, then test a more precise alternative where it fits. For example, a speaker might replace “I can’t take a walk” with a direct account of what prevented the walk, or replace “you always” with the specific behavior that caused frustration.
No formal follow-up, study or policy change is announced in the supplied material. Whether a wording change helps will depend on the situation and the speaker’s actual circumstances; the article presents reflection and experimentation, rather than a guaranteed result, as the practical takeaway.
Key Questions
Which six expressions does the essay recommend reconsidering?
They are “I’ll try,” “can’t,” “always,” “never,” “if only” and “but.” The author treats “always” and “never” as separate expressions.
Is this advice based on a scientific study?
The supplied essay does not cite research testing its claims. It presents personal experiences and opinions, so its examples should not be treated as scientific proof.
Does the author say these words should never be used?
The headline says “must not say,” but the body is better understood as a recommendation to notice habitual phrasing. It does not establish a universal ban on words that may be accurate in a particular situation.
What does the essay suggest saying instead?
It recommends more specific wording: state what you will do rather than “I’ll try,” describe a real choice or limitation instead of defaulting to “can’t,” and consider “and” rather than “but” when joining an affectionate statement to a qualification.
Source: sixtyandme.com
